IUI #3 A happy ending I hope.

I emerge swollen eyed from the worst month I've ever experienced.  I'm still in a state of shock so am so thankful for this IUI to distract me from the grief of the past few weeks.  Who knew that a 2ww would be a welcomed distraction... I won't need any help getting through this one... for sure!

Just over a month ago I got a call from a good friend who wasn't feeling well.  He knew I'd just gotten an Affordable Healthcare Plan and he wanted help in getting one too.  I did it 2 days before the deadline and just over a week later he called me with the news:

Cancer

He went in for a surgery to make him more comfortable.  Turns out he'd been in a lot of pain but hadn't told anyone.  

Stage 4.  

Already in liver & lymph nodes... just a year maximum to live.  

But the bigger problem was that he didn't heal from the surgery so they had to go in again... he ended up in the ICU... more complications than I ever want to bore you with.  Suffice to say that I was in there every day visiting and talking to him - even when he was in a coma and hoping with all my might that he would pull through enough that we could just talk to him again.  

Just as it looked like he might be making a come back things took a turn for the ultimate worse.  His family and friends were faced with turning off his life support.  

By far the hardest thing I've ever had to do... saying goodbye.  

He was so young (52) and such a sweet heart.  

It's been so hard to wrap my head around the fact that he is no longer with us.  

On the other hand I've gotten to know his best friend whom I'd only ever seen in passing before... we've become extremely close and he's very supportive/excited about my journey to become a mother.  I've also become close with his family and everyone around him during those times.  We've become a tight unit of our own.  

I silently asked him if he could do me a favor when he gets up there and help his namesake be born!  I fully intend to give his name as a middle name to my child whether it's male or female!  

Since he's been gone my left ovary has kicked into action... finally the side that's connected to my Uterus is showing itself to be able to produce a good follicle.  

At the clinic today my favorite nurse did the IUI.  Upon leaving, the billboard by the hospital had my friends name on it.  The road was sponsored by a company bearing his name.   I saw the signs I wanted to see.

So now I'm just hoping the balance of the Universe takes someone away but gives me someone back.  A BFP would certainly help lift me from my sadness.


Rest in Peace my lovely friend.  You are missed.