Blood Moon. A vent that has nothing to do with TTC.

There comes a point when a person can reach their breaking point.  For me it took my whole lifetime but yesterday I finally said 'enough is enough' and flipped a switch on my sister and her under the thumb husband.  

The history does not belong here but people who know me know how I've put up with snide comments and bad treatment for years.  When she was pregnant it was commonly predicted that my nephew would be the ultimate trump card and mechanism of control over my Mother and I.  We were not wrong.  (She didn't speak to me for the first 6 months of her pregnancy, said she would never let me see her child and then got sick and had to be looked after by us as her husband was away and she doesn't have many friends.)

No matter how much time we give, it's never enough.  It started when nephew was 3 weeks of age when said that she felt that one or the other of us should be relieving her for 3 hours each day to get a break from her infant.   I feel that it's her child and he was a difficult, unhappy baby... 3 hours a day is way too much to expect to be away from your newborn! We were frequently there for company FYI.  She was far from being on her own.

As he got older things changed however.  Let me be clear... this child spends 2/3 days in child care and then historically spends a day each with my mother and I.  That's 4-5 days a week since roughly a year old that he's been away from his mother.  Add to this my desire to see him at weekends and she gets her break at the weekend too.  The next complaint - not enough sleepovers. 

Whenever she gets mad she stops us seeing him.  She kept him from me for 3 months at the end of last year for reasons way too ridiculous to go into here... it's another blog in itself.  She's mad at my Mother now and is so disgusting to her that she won't even look at her.  She says snide, hurtful things to us constantly and yesterday, after she said that she wouldn't see us for Easter due to my having a friend in tow I finally snapped.  

My timing was terrible.... inappropriate even.  My emotions were not.  I apologized to her husband for yet another holiday ruined by her.  He stuck up for her behavior.  I condemned their ungratefulness and yelled (ugh, I yelled!) that I was sick of them both and that she was an asshole.  (She was screaming her vile words at me at the time.)  

It was a scene out of a movie involving very unsavory characters but it was my life.  I've bitten my tongue for so long that it hurts.  She's incapable of empathy or forgiveness and yet she has committed the worst crimes of all.  She lies and manipulates and deprives me of my lovely nephew at the drop of a hat.  I am so done with it.  

Of course I don't know where to go from here.  I find it ironic that it all happened on a blood moon.  Finally the full moon brought out my rage.  Sadly, life would be easier without her in it.  My friends don't know how I went this long without snapping.  I can't apologize... I'm not sorry.  I wish I'd been able to say more but my nephew walked into the situation so I drove away leaving much unsaid.  Probably for the best as I'm pretty sure her husband was close to hitting me. 

Why can't you choose your family?